Women and their parents report that intelligence is more important than physical attractiveness in a long-term partner, yet when forced to choose, they both favor a more attractive mate—even when the less attractive option is described as more intelligent. This study was published in Evolutionary Psychological Science.
Parental involvement in daughters’ mate selection is common across cultures, with parents often prioritizing traits linked to long-term stability, such as intelligence and resource acquisition. While both women and their parents rank intelligence as highly desirable, physical attractiveness is typically rated as less important. Most research has relied on self-reported ideal preferences rather than experimental scenarios that require trade-offs between these traits.
Madeleine A. Fugère and colleagues examined whether these stated preferences aligned with actual mate choices when women and their parents faced constrained options.
According to evolutionary theory, attractiveness signals genetic quality, while intelligence suggests resource acquisition potential and investment in offspring. Women generally prioritize attractiveness more than their parents, who may de-emphasize it due to concerns about an attractive mate’s long-term stability.
The researchers recruited 201 daughters (ages 18-33) and 187 parents, primarily mothers, from a university community and social media. The study examined both self-reported mate preferences and actual choices under constrained conditions. Participants first rated the importance of traits such as intelligence and physical attractiveness in a long-term partner for themselves (daughters) or for their daughters (parents). They then evaluated potential mates in an experimental scenario that systematically manipulated these traits.
To create the conditions, researchers selected two photographs of men, pre-rated for attractiveness, with one more attractive and the other less so. Each man was paired with either a high or low peer-reported intelligence rating, resulting in four combinations: high attractiveness/high intelligence, high attractiveness/low intelligence, low attractiveness/high intelligence, and low attractiveness/low intelligence. Participants, assigned to one of these conditions, rated the target man’s attractiveness, intelligence, and desirability as a long-term partner.
Finally, participants were shown both men—their assigned target and an alternative from another condition—and asked to choose the better long-term mate for themselves (daughters) or for their daughters (parents), providing written justifications for their choices.
The findings revealed a stark contrast between stated preferences and actual choices. While both daughters and parents initially rated intelligence as more important than attractiveness in an ideal partner, their selections told a different story. The majority of daughters (72.6%) and parents (59.6%) chose the more attractive man, regardless of his intelligence level, suggesting that physical appearance exerts a stronger influence in constrained decisions than individuals consciously recognize.
Daughters and parents largely agreed on their choices (73.8% agreement), but when attractiveness and intelligence were in conflict, they differed in their trade-offs. Daughters favored the more attractive but less intelligent man, whereas parents more often chose the less attractive but more intelligent one, indicating that parents prioritize long-term stability and resource acquisition more than their daughters do.
In open-ended responses, participants justified their choices differently depending on the conditions. When the attractive man was also highly intelligent, intelligence was frequently cited as the deciding factor. However, when the traits were in conflict, daughters emphasized physical appeal, while parents highlighted intelligence.
These findings reveal a gap between self-reported preferences and actual mate choices, showing that physical attractiveness influences selection more than individuals may consciously realize. The study also suggests that parent-offspring conflict in mate selection is less pronounced than expected, as parents and daughters often make similar choices.
One limitation of the study is its reliance on hypothetical mate choices rather than real-life dating or marriage decisions, which may introduce differences in how participants evaluate trade-offs.
The research, “The Relative Importance of Attractiveness and Intelligence to the Mate Preferences and Choices of Women and Their Parents,” was authored by Madeleine A. Fugère, Noelle Ciccarelli, Yineli Rodriguez, and Alita J. Cousins.
