New research sheds light on why relationship power is linked to interest in alternative partners

A new study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that higher perceived power in romantic relationships increases individuals’ interest in alternative partners, and this effect is driven by their perception of having higher mate value than their partner.

Research has long explored the effects of power in non-romantic contexts, showing that people with power are more likely to experience confidence, assertiveness, and increased sexual motivation. However, Gurit E. Birnbaum and colleagues wanted to examine how power within romantic relationships could similarly influence desires for alternative partners. Prior studies had examined power imbalances related to sexual dynamics, but most focused on correlational designs, leaving open questions about the mechanisms that might link relationship power to infidelity.

The researchers conducted four studies designed to examine the connection between perceived power within romantic relationships and expressions of extradyadic desires. Participants across all studies were romantically involved individuals, primarily recruited from undergraduate programs.

The first two studies utilized experimental manipulations to induce feelings of relationship power and measure subsequent expressions of desire for alternative partners. In Study 1, participants were randomly assigned to either a power or control condition. Those in the power condition were asked to recall and describe an instance where they felt they had power over their romantic partner, while those in the control condition described a typical day in their relationship. After the manipulation, participants were asked to write a sexual fantasy about someone other than their partner, which was later coded for expressions of sexual desire for alternative partners.

Study 2 followed a similar power manipulation procedure, but instead of writing fantasies, participants viewed photos of strangers and were asked to quickly judge whether they would consider each stranger as a potential partner. This method was designed to capture more automatic, unconscious responses to attractive alternatives.

In Studies 3 and 4, the focus shifted to more naturalistic settings and daily experiences. In Study 3, participants first described power dynamics in their relationships and then interacted face-to-face with an attractive confederate (a trained actor). They were then asked to rate their sexual desire for the confederate. This allowed the researchers to assess whether perceived power influenced participants’ interest in alternative partners in a more direct interaction.

Study 4 extended this investigation over time, with both members of heterosexual couples completing daily reports on perceived power, mate value, and engagement in extradyadic behavior for 21 consecutive days. This method allowed the researchers to capture real-life fluctuations in power and their influence on both desire and behavior in the context of daily life.

The results consistently showed that perceptions of power within romantic relationships increase individuals’ desires for alternative partners, and this link is mediated by the perception of higher relative mate value. In Study 1, participants who were induced to feel more powerful reported greater sexual desire for alternative partners in their written fantasies. This effect was particularly pronounced for men, suggesting that men may be more likely to express sexual interest in alternatives when they feel powerful in their relationships. However, the power manipulation did not significantly affect women’s desire for alternative partners in this study.

Study 2 supported these findings, with participants in the power condition showing a greater automatic tendency to view attractive strangers as potential partners. Both men and women in the power condition were more likely to consider alternatives, suggesting that relationship power diminishes motivation to protect the relationship from outside temptations. This was a more direct measure of attraction, using rapid judgments under time pressure to reveal unconscious desires.

In Studies 3 and 4, the researchers further examined the mechanisms behind these effects. In Study 3, participants who perceived themselves to have more power over their partner also perceived themselves to have higher mate value. This perception, in turn, predicted a greater interest in an attractive stranger during a face-to-face interaction. Study 4, which tracked participants over a three-week period, revealed that fluctuations in daily power were associated with changes in perceived mate value, which then predicted increased engagement in extradyadic behaviors such as flirting or fantasizing about someone other than their partner.

Together, these studies suggest that a sense of relationship power leads individuals to believe they have better mating opportunities, which fuels their interest in alternative partners.

One limitation is that the studies relied on self-reporting and experimental manipulations that might not fully capture the complexity of real-world relationships.

The research, “The Power to Flirt: Power within Romantic Relationships and Its Contribution to Expressions of Extradyadic Desire”, was authored by Gurit E. Birnbaum, Yaniv Kanat-Maymon, Kobi Zholtack, Rafael Avidan, and Harry T. Reis.