A new study published in The Journal of Sex Research highlights the role that social support plays in improving the relationship quality of individuals in consensual non-monogamous relationships. Researchers found that those with a supportive social network, including family and friends, were better equipped to handle societal stigma. This support appeared to be particularly beneficial for individuals who internalized negative views about their relationships due to societal pressures favoring monogamy.
Consensual non-monogamy refers to romantic relationships in which all partners agree to maintain emotional and/or sexual connections with multiple people. Despite the fact that one in five people have reportedly been in a consensual non-monogamous relationship at some point, these relationships are often met with stigmatization due to the prevalence of “mononormativity” — the widespread belief that romantic partnerships should involve emotional and sexual exclusivity between two people.
These beliefs can create a stigma that can be damaging, particularly when individuals internalize these negative attitudes, leading to what researchers call internalized negativity. Previous studies have shown that internalized negativity can negatively affect self-esteem and well-being in other marginalized groups. However, not much is known about how this impacts people in consensual non-monogamous relationships.
“There is substantial evidence that individuals in consensual non-monogamous relationships often maintain highly functional relationships,” said study author David L. Rodrigues, vice director of CIS-Iscte at Iscte-University Institute of Lisbon. “However, research is only beginning to explore the impact of the social stigma associated with these relationship structures. My interest emerged from this contrast, and I am particularly motivated to advance research that serves the consensual non-monogamous community. My goal is to contribute to a deeper understanding of how to enhance psychological wellbeing and social functioning within the context of stigmatized relationship structures.”
The researchers conducted a cross-sectional study involving 439 participants who identified as being in a consensual non-monogamous relationship. These participants came from 35 different countries, although most were from the American continent. The majority of participants identified as White and employed, with a slight majority being female. Around 41% identified as heterosexual, while the rest represented various sexual orientations, including bisexual and pansexual.
Participants were asked a series of questions about their relationships, including whether they had a primary partner and, if so, how they viewed the structure of their relationships. Relationship structure could involve a primary-secondary dynamic (where one partner is considered primary), a co-primary structure (where more than one partner is equally primary), or a non-primary structure (where no partner is considered primary).
The researchers measured internalized negativity using a scale that assessed personal discomfort with being in a consensual non-monogamous relationship, social discomfort, and public identification with consensual non-monogamy. Social support was measured by asking participants to rate the emotional support they received from family and friends.
Other measures included relationship commitment, the extent to which participants had disclosed their relationship status to close and extended social circles, and how accepted they felt by their family and friends. Participants with more than one partner were asked about both their primary and secondary relationships, which allowed the researchers to compare relationship dynamics across different partners.
The researchers found that participants who internalized negative societal views about consensual non-monogamous relationships reported lower commitment to their primary partner, disclosed their relationship agreement less often to people in their social circles, and felt less accepted by their family and friends. They also kept their relationships more secretive, particularly when it came to their secondary partners.
However, the study also found that social support appeared to play a significant role in mitigating these negative outcomes. Individuals who perceived more support from their family and friends were more committed to their primary partner, felt more accepted by those close to them, and were less likely to keep their relationships a secret.
Interestingly, for individuals with high levels of internalized negativity, social support was linked to higher relationship commitment and acceptance, especially with their primary partner. In contrast, those with lower levels of internalized negativity benefited from social support in different ways, including being more open about their relationships with their close social circle and experiencing less secrecy.
“Our study suggests that social support plays a critical role in mitigating the adverse effects of stigma among individuals in consensual non-monogamous relationships,” Rodrigues told PsyPost. “Specifically, we found that a strong and accepting support system from family and friends was beneficial for relationship functioning, particularly for those more susceptible to internalizing societal stigma and negative perceptions of consensual non-monogamy.”
However, the researchers found that for participants with high internalized negativity, greater social support was associated with less disclosure of their relationship agreement to their extended social circles (e.g., coworkers). This suggests that individuals may feel more comfortable confiding in close friends and family but may still fear broader social repercussions if they disclose their relationship to more distant acquaintances or colleagues.
“I was surprised to discover that, while social support can improve relationship dynamics among individuals with multiple consensual non-monogamous partners, it did not seem sufficient to reduce relationship secrecy among those who tended to internalize negative societal views of non-monogamy,” Rodrigues said. “Although we lack empirical data to confirm this hypothesis, these individuals may struggle with balancing private acceptance and public disclosure of their relationship structure. They may require additional sources of support or greater assurance that they will not face stigma from others.”
One of the key limitations is its cross-sectional design, meaning that the researchers could not establish cause-and-effect relationships. Future research could use longitudinal methods to track these processes over time and explore how they evolve.
“The primary limitation of this study relates to the nature of the data,” Rodrigues noted. “We argued that exposure to negative social views of consensual non-monogamy on a daily basis increases the likelihood of internalizing this negativity. However, it is also possible that negative personal experiences within consensual non-monogamous relationships contribute to such internalized negativity.”
“Employing a longitudinal approach will be essential for disentangling these factors and clarifying the roots of internalized negativity. Nevertheless, our study has paved the way for further research to examine whether different forms of social support (e.g., being part of the consensual non-monogamous community) or contextual factors (e.g., workplace policies that utilize inclusive language) serve as additional buffers against the consequences of internalized negativity.”
The study, “Perceived Social Support Buffers the Consequences of Internalized Negativity Among Individuals in Consensual Non-Monogamous Relationships,” was authored by David L. Rodrigues, Thomas R. Brooks, Rhonda N. Balzarini, and Amy C. Moors.
